I have attached a link to this below. If you lived through the 1970s then there will be plenty of things in there that you will remember. Although I do hope Cherry from Dudley isn’t reading this.
It’s also National Poetry Day so I shall post a quick poem too. This one was inspired by an in class exercise and a couple of my lovely friends who work in the dreaded Probation Service. They were talking about some of the incredible excuses some of their clients come up with and it led to this. I’m sure I also once read that Autumn is peak season for Flashers!
In All Good Gentlemans Outfitters
Gentlemen, as the nights draw in and chills descend,
Come along and have a look at our new Autumn range,
designed for the discerning male who wants to look powerful,
The man who wants to appear big and half- naked in snickets and ginnels.
Our clothing is cleverly designed to maximise your masculine appeal
especially to glossy haired teenage girls on their way home from school.
We’ve got the basics just right,
With our spellbound boxer shorts with self opening fly,
No more fiddling about in the dark, when they do all the hard work for you.
Then there is our range of beguiled trousers,
which, upon your command, will bunch up around your knees
And remain there for as long as you need to display
your considerable wares.
And finally, for the discerning male who enjoys his leisure
We introduce the Enchanted Dressing Gown.
Looking like any other ordinary dressing gown,
Its magical powers will exceed all your expectations
as it defies both physics and gravity by sensationally
flapping open when you are trimming the privets
just as the youth club empties for the night.
Wear it when popping to the local shop for a pint of milk
And you will be amazed by its ability to sense a feminine presence
And respond by offering the perfect peekaboo glimpse.
(Terms and Conditions apply, buyers should note that any magical properties ascribed to said clothing does not constitute any legal protection and may harm your defence when stated to law enforcement bodies, magistrates courts and probation officers. Nor will they prevent you being placed for an indeterminate period on the Sex Offenders Register)